"SO THIS IS CHRISTMAS"

"So this is Christmas
\
And what have you done

Another year over

And a new one just begun"

The lyrics to this famous John Lennon song took me through so many reflections and 

emotions during this holiday season. I think I'm going through some deep soul searching here lately. 

From which according to my husband, is brought on by my melancholy mood during the holidays 

anyway.

Taking that into consideration, I can't help but immerse myself more into what these lyrics mean to

 me nowadays. And when I do look back as to what I've done this past year, the only thing that come 

to mind is an experience I've had with a patient of mine during one of my outreach calls.

"And so this is Christmas

I hope you have fun

The near and the dear ones

The old and the young"

I can still hear how his voice sounded over the phone. My 94 year old patient said, "I was married for 
76 years. That's more than someone else's lifetime. My wife died 7 months ago. I miss her dearly". I can't stop my tears from rolling down my face. And for a moment, I didn't think I can go on listening to him. But why can't I? He kept on living. Why can't I  listen?

"A very merry Christmas

And a happy New Year

Let's hope it's a good one

Without any fear"

And as if he read my thoughts,  He muttered, "I took care of her here in our house, up until she became like a baby. I fed her, watched over her, changed her diaper. All by myself ". His voice did not give out a hint of complaint, of regret, or  disappointment. It was a voice of someone who will do everything all over again, just to see her again.

"And so this is Christmas

For weak and for strong

For rich and the poor ones

The world is so wrong"

It was at that moment when I realized that what I was listening to was a reminder of how life can be beautiful yet, unfair at the same time. Why is that?

I don't know.

But what I learned is that, life is beautiful when you find your one true love.

Despite going through The Great Depression and World War Two together, they managed to raise three wonderful children. Each one, he said gave them beautiful grandchildren. He worked hard. And he proudly said, " I came home every night...My family is my life. I live for my family.. This is home.". . And to that, I felt his strength and determination during his younger years, trying his hardest to provide the best for his family.

How many people do you think can honestly say that they live for their family. That they have a place they can call their home

"And so happy Christmas

For black and for white

For yellow and red ones

Let's stop all the fight"

If we really did take the time, and count our blessings, do you think we'll even have time to fight and gripe at one another? We have so much to be thankful for.

And I am thankful for this.

What I have done was reach out to this gentleman, who in turn had changed me when I needed it most. So, I am not jaded after all. That I still have feelings, hope for humanity, love for myself.

Just like what he said.....This is Home.

And I say......This Is Christmas

He might not remember me or the conversation we had that one fine day. But one thing I know, I will remember him for the rest of my life.

What have you done???